Gotcha, Little Guy! (Part 6)

David was getting kind of tired, especially after having grown and shrunk rapidly, and especially now that his body was consuming fuel and wanting to go into recuperation mode. He finished off a Clif bar, took a long swig of Powerade, and then lay back, resting on his hands, his tiny form dwarfed by the vast table surface and the meals of his titanic hosts.

“Big bro, are you going to sleep?” Conor asked, smacking his lips childishly about 10 feet above his babysitter’s position. “Do you want to try some roo?” He held out a sliver of baked kangaroo meat that was about as big as David’s forearm.

David glanced up before closing his eyes and verping a little in his mouth. “No thanks, Conor, I never touch the stuff,” he said. To be honest, he’d never tried kangaroo, but after seeing the giant kid toss a cooked animal that was about the same size as a human body into his huge mouth and chomp it to nothingness — let’s just say he was seriously considering becoming a vegetarian. The image of that deadly mouth opening below his hanging body, revealing its glossy pink insides and deep, dark, lethal abyss as it had done only a little while ago, flashed through his mind.

“Deleting that memory now, please,” he thought to himself as he drifted off into a temporary state of slumber.

Of course it wouldn’t last, but to be fair, Cade and Conor both finished their meals in relative peace and allowed their human guest a few moments of quiet rest while they took care of their dishes and cleaned up their mess. David slept about 10 minutes before the giant boys got bored and started poking him awake.

They adjourned the party to the reading room again, this time with Cade running to the twins’ bedroom to retrieve some of their car toys, having been inspired by the antics that played out while he and Conor were (to their usual perspective) tiny.

Conor sat on the couch, kicking his legs benignly while calmly petting David on his head. David tried to bat the kid’s finger away, but he and the boy playfully smirked at each other, knowing it was all in good fun. David was grateful to have even a small moment of alone time with Conor that didn’t involve him fearing for his safety, but he had no idea how inwardly happy Conor was — how he treasured even those few seconds. Conor wasn’t as adept as Cade at showing affection, and he still felt bad about playing too rough earlier. He was about to say something about this when Cade came thundering into the room, his soft step spell finally wearing off. He carried a huge mesh bag full of toy cars and wooden track pieces.

David had to admit it was a pretty sweet set-up. The twins left him on the couch to watch them construct a gigantic, spiraling, wooden roller coaster of doom. More impressive, still, was how quickly and effortlessly these giant boys, lifting what had to be tons upon tons of material, put it together. To them, a block of wood the size of a semi truck weighed nothing at all.

Cade turned to David on the couch and reached out for him, and David jumped in alarm. “Dude, um, I’m not sure I want to ride a car on that thing. It looks pretty painful,” he said.

Cade smiled sweetly and gently wrapped his fingers around his human friend. “I wasn’t gonna make you ride it, Big bro,” he chuckled. “I just wanted to hold you a little bit, if that’s OK.” With that, he sat down criss-cross next to the huge track and, with his left hand, started shuffling through the available vehicles. Occasionally, absent-mindedly, he would scratch an irritation on the sole of his left foot.

Conor, sitting on the other side of the massive creation, putting on his finishing touches, noticed that, yet again, his brother was hogging the babysitter’s attention. Perhaps he was tired of whining about it, because he chose to remain silent and pensive this time.

Cade chose a yellow school bus first, then an old-timey-looking Coke truck, and then a Hummer — all of them were too big and heavy to make it all the way around the track. Conor chose a motorcycle (it fell over), then a dragster (slightly too long), and then finally made it all the way around with the purple Jeep they had played with before dinner. He hooted and reveled in his victory.

David felt conflicted. At first, he hadn’t been thrilled with the idea of being manhandled and then launched into space, but after a while, quite irrationally, he started to feel disappointed. Why weren’t the kids playing with him on this thing?

“Hey guys,” he said, finally, deciding to put his trust in the magical protections the boys’ mother, Vivian, had given him. “Which car can I ride?” He stood up in Cade’s palm and put his hands on his hips in a Superman pose.

Conor giggled and scrambled his hands through the pile of cars. “How about this one?” he asked, and held up a white formula one racer covered in professional insignia.

David rubbed his chin and thought it over. “It looks pretty cool, but I think it’s got too many pointy edges. I want to hold on tight, but I want to be comfortable, too,” he said.

Cade grabbed a kind of ugly faded yellow Dodge Viper with badly painted black racing stripes. “How about this one?” he asked. “Its wheels move really smooth.”

“I like that one. If I were rich, I’d want a real Viper,” David said. “But I kind of want to ride in style. How about that one over there?”

He pointed to a smaller-than-average-scale car lying upside down in the carpet. Conor turned it over, revealing an aquamarine Lamborghini Diablo.

“Beautiful,” David whispered, and his eyes flashed.

It was like holding onto a big, wide luge sled, really. David was intent on riding out the whole track face first. He knew that his magical bracelet and ring would keep him from being crushed or falling to his death. Whether other forms of blunt force trauma were covered in that package remained uncertain, so he was prepared to bail over the side of the track if anything got too scary.

Conor kneeled next to his position, his hand poised to launch the car into infinity, and … well, you know. He pulled it back to give it space for pushing.

“Ready, set … GOOOO!!!” he screamed.

David had never felt a more visceral thrill in his life. It was 10 times better than any real roller coaster. His car rumbled at breakneck speed over undulating stretches of track before hitting two loop-de-loops and a major drop. He built up huge amounts of momentum at the end, before the track’s finale: a ramp into nowhere. His car leapt into the cool air of the reading room — he let go and floated on his magic cloud — and Cade caught him in his outstretched hands.

“That was so cool!” both boys cheered in unison, hopping around the carpeted floor. Cade stopped and scratched at his left foot again.

“Whoo! That was exciting!” David said, a little short of breath as he lounged upon Cade’s soft palm. “I liked it, but I don’t know if I’ll ever do that again. I don’t know if my heart can take it.”

Suddenly, an idea burst in his mind.

“Actually … I might do that last ramp again. Where did you guys say my longboard ended up?”

Cade’s face went white. He let out a heavy sigh, standing there slouching in his guilt. He solemnly carried David back over to the couch. “I might as well just tell the truth and get it over with,” he thought.

He gently set David down on the middle cushion and climbed up next to him, doing his best not to jostle the surface too much and upset the little human’s position. When he was finally seated, legs crossed and hands folded, facing his friend, he spoke. His voice shook a little as he tried his best not to cry at all — he had already cried enough that day and felt like a stupid little baby for it.

“David, I need to tell you something,” he said. “I … I …” He sighed again.

David, of course, was not born yesterday. He had a good guess what these signs were pointing to. “What’s up, Cade? You can tell me. I won’t be mad,” he said. It was mostly true.

“David, I … stepped on your longboard when we were playing hide and seek,” he said, and as soon as it all had left his lips, he breathed out and hung his head, the skin of his face flushing red and tingling with apprehension.

“Well, thank you for telling me,” David said in a very ‘50s TV show fatherly voice. To be honest, he was slightly miffed, but not extremely surprised. “How badly damaged is it?”

Cade timidly reached inside his left pocket and fished out the longboard’s remains, then held them in front of his human babysitter.

From then on, whenever David saw or heard the word “smithereens,” he would have a perfect visual reference. In Cade’s huge hand was a pile of mangled, shattered wood with assorted pieces of metal and plastic mixed in. Not a single piece wasn’t bent or cracked. Some of the paint on some pieces even looked like it had been slightly sanded off. It was as if Wile E. Coyote had tried to use David’s longboard to kill the Roadrunner.

He couldn’t help laughing. “Wow,” he said, and threw up his hands in resignation. “That is a seriously destroyed … whatever you could call it now.” He chuckled, smiling sincerely, and looked up at Cade’s face. Conor, sitting on the other side of the couch, behind David, just looked on, awestruck.

“Are you mad at me?” Cade asked, cutely and unconsciously jutting his lip out. “I’m really sorry.”

David shrugged his shoulders. “I’m a little sad to lose my longboard, but it’s not that big of a deal. It was kind of old, anyway,” he said. “I accept your apology. A 10 year old’s going to break stuff sometimes. No prob.”

Conor laughed at that. “We’re not 10! We’re 8 years old!” he said.

“What?? You guys look older than that!” David exclaimed, whipping his head around to look at Conor’s grinning face.

“We’re big for our age,” Cade said, scratching at his foot again. It was really getting annoying, and since he’d confessed to his crime, he figured he might ask David for help. He stuck his foot, which was twice as tall as the human, next to David’s spot. “Big Bro … I think a piece of your longboard is stuck in my foot,” he said. “I’ve been trying and trying to get it out, and I can’t get to it. Can you, um …”

David looked with incredulity on the slightly smudged, olive skinned appendage towering over him. Lucky for him, it didn’t really smell at all, or else he might have passed out, since it was already a shock to see this huge thing plopped down right next to him. Once again, he was reminded briefly of a tense situation with Conor earlier, when the boy had quietly played with the notion of stepping on him. “Another memory to delete,” he thought.

He sighed. “You owe me one, little bro. Bend it closer to me so I can see where the splinter is,” he said.

The ball of Cade’s foot leaned down and brushed against the top of David’s head before he ducked and backed up a bit to examine it. Looking it over, he quickly found where a sliver of wood had been embedded in the skin. There was no blood, just some broken tissue. He was surprised at himself for not really being grossed out by it. “Maybe I should be a doctor for giants,” he thought.

Using his strong hands, he found the tip of the sliver jutting outside the wrapping of skin and gave it a powerful tug, releasing it almost instantly. The force of pulling on it and feeling it dislodge threw him off balance, and he had to steady himself with his left hand on Cade’s foot. The giant boy giggled and stretched his enormous toes, obviously tickled by the feather-light contact.

David waved the long piece of wood around a bit. It looked like it came from the edge of the longboard, and was about the size of a small crowbar. An uncharacteristically devilish look crossed his face as he slapped it into his palm. Then, with a flourish, he swiped it along the underside of Cade’s foot.

The boy screamed with laughter and pulled back his legs, holding his knees tightly to his chest while David grinned triumphantly. “Are you a little sensitive, Cade?” he said, and was about to taunt him a second time, when suddenly he felt a strong push from behind.

He whirled around to find Conor’s right foot advancing on him, like a monstrous five-headed hydra. He attacked wildly with his makeshift sword, and managed to ward off a big toe the size of a large beach ball. Conor was mostly reclined, his body propped up on his elbows, and he snickered as he used one foot to distract the human while the other foot, like a second velociraptor, closed in from the side. Soon, he had David trapped, and the sliver of wood fell from his hand.

“Ugh! Conor! This is kind of disgusting, you know!” David yelled, retching theatrically.

“I will let you go if you admit ‘de-feet’!” Conor said, and Cade groaned and rolled his eyes. To Conor’s utter delight, though, David laughed at the pun.

“If you let me go, I promise I will never tickle anyone ever again,” David said. “And I also promise to wash these clothes ten times to get your stink out of them.”

Conor grinned and nodded his head in acceptance of the terms, releasing the human from his gentle, but slightly smelly, imprisonment. But then, surprising no one, he launched his whole body forward. David felt another heart attack moment as he saw a body as big as a building fly overhead.

“I’m on your team, big bro!” Conor shouted as he attacked his twin on the opposite side of the couch with rapid, vicious tickling on his ribs. Cade guffawed uncontrollably and tried to wrestle his brother away, but both boys ultimately fell over the edge and landed with a massive THOOM on the floor. The change in location did nothing to stymie Conor’s assault, and Cade tried, weakly, to retaliate with his own jabs to Conor’s armpits and hips.

David watched with detached amusement from the couch as Cade and Conor wrestled each other into exhaustion. The long day was finally starting to get to them, and after several minutes of trying to pin and torture each other, they sat on the carpet and panted like a pair of colossal dogs.

David pulled out his phone — he was astonished that it had stayed in his pocket this whole time — and was shocked to find that it was already a little past 7 p.m. Vivian was supposed to have returned to the house by now, at least according to what she told him when she dropped him off.

Almost as if they had read his mind, the giant twins crawled back onto the couch next to David, and while Cade yawned, Conor asked, “Where’s our mom? I thought she would come home after dinner.”

“I’m not sure, man. She might have just got caught in a conversation or something. I’m sure she’ll be here soon,” David said, instinctively backing himself up from the edge of the couch. Both boys sighed loudly.

“She’s always late,” Cade said sleepily, and stretched out, laying his head by his human friend. His long brown curls hung lazily over his face.

“We’ve had a lot of babysitters,” Conor said, a little forlorn, as he too got comfortable, resting his head on his hands. “Mom’s an important doctor. She knows a lot more spells than most people.”

“What about your Dad? Is he out on business a lot?” David asked.

“Yeah,” both boys said in unison. Conor’s expression showed a kind of deep sadness. Cade’s flashed very briefly with anger.

“OK, let’s change topic,” David thought. “Well, uh, I’ve really enjoyed getting to see you guys again,” he said. “I was scared of being around a couple of giants all day, but all in all …”

He didn’t get to finish. In a flurry of movement, he found himself snatched up in Conor’s hand and held in front of the huge boy’s pleading face.

“Big bro, we love you,” Conor said, and he hugged the human against his cheek. “Can’t you stay with us when our mom gets home? Don’t you think you could stay the night?”

“Or maybe longer!” Cade said, suddenly more alert. “You could come live with us! I’ll bet our parents wouldn’t mind!”

“Yeah, David!” Conor said, his excitement mounting. “I heard that in Europe, some giant families have humans who live with them!”

“Whoa! Whoa, guys! I’m not a pet, you know. I have a family, and school, and human friends.”

“But we would take good care of you,” Cade said, getting up by his brother and putting his arm around him. He smiled at the human in his twin’s hand and drew closer to him. “We’ve got money! We could give you everything you need, and you could still visit your friends and family.”

“My mom could teach you magic! And she could give you an allowance!” Conor said.

“And you could stay in our room,” Cade said, and he gave David’s head a gentle pet with his finger. “You could sleep on a pillow in my bed.”

Conor gave his brother a bemused look. “That would be weird, Cade. We could give him his own room,” he said. “And one of our rooms would be bigger than any human house, y’know!”

David smiled weakly and thrust his hands out in a defensive gesture. “Guys, come on! I love you, too, you’re my little bros, but you know I can’t stay here,” he said, and watched their smiles droop. “Come on now, guys. I’ll definitely visit you again. I’ll visit you as much as I can, but I’m almost a grown-up, right? I’ve got things I have to do for myself in the human territory.”

The boys were disappointed, but they understood. They settled back down into reclined positions, Cade’s arm still around Conor’s shoulders and David held snugly against Conor’s vast abdomen. He was thankful that at least he wasn’t being mashed into the kid’s shirt face first. In all honesty, the position was kind of warm and cozy. He listened to the muffled thrumming of the boy’s massive heart and felt his huge breaths go in and out. He was starting to fall asleep again.

“David, can you tell us a story?” Cade asked in a quiet voice.

“Huh? Yeah, what kind of story?”

Conor yawned loudly. “Tell us a human story,” he said. “We’ve heard all the giant ones.”

“But not ‘Jack and the Beanstalk,’” Cade said, in a humorless deadpan. “That story sucks.”

David chuckled with his eyes closed, and he didn’t feel too much like opening them again.

“OK,” he said. “Let me think a little bit …” He was really at a loss, so he went to his mainstay whenever he’d had to entertain his little step brother: Recite the plot of a movie. For some reason, in that moment, he only thought of a movie his uncle had shown him recently. “OK, once upon a time, there was a girl who lived by the sea …”

He proceeded to spend the next several minutes talking about the girl who flew flags outside her grandmother’s house, about the boy on the boat who answered her, and about how the boy and girl went to the same school, fell in love, and found out their parents were connected. It wasn’t a fantasy, not an action story — it was just peaceful, beautiful, serene. When he finished, the twins were both asleep.

Before he drifted off himself, David thought how strange it was that they would be so tired so early in the evening, but he figured again that it was a side effect of the shrinking and growing magic from earlier. As he shifted into unconsciousness, enjoying the hypnotizing movement of the giant warm belly rising and falling slowly beneath him, he felt a deep contentment.



When he awoke, his hands were wrapped around glossy red leather, his face was covered by a plastic helmet, and his butt vibrated on top of a motorcycle seat. His backpack was tightly secured to his shoulders, and he watched miles of dark forest rush past him and listened to the vigorous humming and growling of a Kawasaki Ninja. In front, he saw Vivian’s curly brown hair whip around in the wind, mostly covered by her own head protection.

When she dropped him off at his house, which was still and calm and bathed in moonlight, she thanked him and filled his hands with cash (including a little extra for the broken longboard, which she found out about via “special means”), but he stopped her from getting on her bike and leaving right away.

“Mrs. Vivian,” he said, realizing he didn’t know her last name, “I had a good time babysitting Cade and Conor. If you ever need me again …” He paused to think before rephrasing. “If Cade and Conor need me to visit again, just let me know. I’ll be glad to do it. For free.”

Vivian smiled warmly at the teen boy and nodded assent before she took off into the night.